Tuesday - 9:27 a.m.

Last night, I found myself getting really antsy. And frankly, kind of grumpy (just ask Erin!). I was working on a flyer for our big Adoption Fundraising Open House that we're doing Nov 8th, and I kept getting interrupted. And it wasn't going the way I wanted it to, so I was getting frustrated. And then I started getting frustrated at the simple fact that I was getting frustrated. I knew that once I got some work done on it, I'd feel much better. And I did. The whole thing was really quite stupid, and I feel foolish for letting it happen.

Blame it on a lack of sleep I guess, but I never used to get that way. Ever. Everything used to roll off my back like it was no big deal, even if it was a big deal and should have bothered me. For a while, I thought: "Well, it's just because I've grown up. I have real responsibilities now and that's just how it is." And I suppose there's some truth to that, but not much.

If I didn't believe in or follow the God of the universe, I could understand my anxiety. If I didn't believe the promise of Heaven, of course things would get to me. If I didn't know what Scripture says about worrying or hadn't learned about grace, then I would have every right to worry.

But I know better. I know what Scripture says. I know about and believe in God's grace and about Heaven. So, why do I still have times that I worry? It's stupid. I mean, for crying out loud, the flyers for our event aren't that big of a deal. Why let it eat at me?

It's certainly NOT that I didn't know or believe all the promises of God. It's that I let myself get sucked in by the things of the world, and temporarily took my eyes off of what matters. And I sank. For some reason, I couldn't stop focussing on those stupid flyers and forgot that they have absolutely zero effect on anything eternal. Now that I got some work done on them, won in fantasy football, and got in a good nights rest and a good chat with God, I'm good again. I'm at peace.

I just want to stay there.